How to deal with insecurity — advice from a psychologist

Insecurity manifests itself to some degree in the lives of most people. Various fears and complexes prevent you from being yourself and living a full life. However, there are ways to cope with psychological clamps.

Why does uncertainty and fear of showing oneself become part of our lives? The roots of such problems often go back to childhood. A striking example is the situation with the birth of an unwanted child in the family, who was told about this fact by parents or someone from others. This leads to the fact that a person feels unwanted, becomes dependent and does not find his place.

In such a situation, the child simply does not understand how to adapt to the world, psychologist Olga Dandar explains to dni.ru. This happens at the subconscious level, is recorded in the subcortex of the brain.

Also, if parents show themselves insecure, do not strive to achieve more, then this model of behavior will pass to the child.

“Then he lives by inertia: he goes to work, earns some money. At the same time, a person is not liberated, downtrodden and does not know how to express himself. If he gets a job, a block occurs on it and fears are revealed. So the employee occupies some niche of his own, is afraid to move up the career ladder, they don’t notice him”said the expert.

School can also lead to the emergence of psychological clamps. Often, various labels are hung on students by teachers and thereby trigger the development of a loser complex. Constant belittling of a person leads to low self-esteem. Then it accompanies him for the rest of his life.

Sometimes a person is so constrained that he is afraid to even speak, gets lost and hides his eyes. Usually, in the course of communication with a psychologist, it turns out that he faced bullying and violence in childhood, was an unwanted child. Such people often find themselves an abusive partner who makes the clamps even stronger.

Psychologist Dandar says that many people are used to living like this.

«They do not see this as a problem, they are comfortable sitting in their swamp,» she emphasizes.

How to overcome insecurity

Awareness of one’s psychological problems leads to the need to set a goal and a way to achieve it. For example, the desire to grow up the career ladder can lead a person to courses in personnel management or other training.

Changing your image is the easiest way to feel different. The expert advises to replace old things, hair, buy new perfume, cosmetics and put yourself in order. This contributes to a shift in energy, a change in the energy state and perception of oneself as a whole.

A positive effect in solving psychological problems can be provided by a good and strong partner who will support and exert pressure in the right direction. At the same time, such a life partner should really see the dignity in a person and not focus on the shortcomings.

“There are many different techniques and practices that are in the public domain, they can be tried and applied. For development, motivational trainings, trainings for personal growth, and increasing female energy are very helpful. Who is missing something. It is important to identify your failures and move forward, find your place.the expert advised.

Meditation, according to the psychologist, acts as another effective way to get rid of psychological clamps.

Hypnosis can also trigger changes within a person. With it, you can remove negative attitudes, acquire positive ones and change your subconscious.